Core Idea
- Difficulty
- Easy
- Read it if
- You want to revitalize your prayer life, understand different forms of prayer, or are struggling with common prayer challenges like doubt or unanswered prayers. This book is for anyone seeking a more authentic and less intimidating approach to connecting with God.
- Skip it if
- You are looking for a highly academic theological treatise on prayer, prefer a very rigid liturgical approach, or are not open to modern, accessible language about spiritual practices.
Key Takeaways from How to Pray
Prayer is Not a Performance
Embrace authenticity and simplicity over rigid religious rituals.
Many people approach prayer feeling inadequate, believing there is a 'right' way to do it with fancy words or specific poses. Greig breaks down this idea, stressing that God wants a true connection, not a performance. He encourages readers to drop the pressure to sound spiritual and instead, come as they are, with all their doubts, fears, and messy thoughts. This change from duty to personal connection makes prayer open to everyone, no matter their spiritual background. It turns prayer from a hard task into a simple, honest talk.
“Prayer is not about mastering a technique; it's about encountering a person.”
In the book: Greig frequently references the simplicity of Jesus' own prayer life and his teachings against public, showy prayers (Matthew 6:5-8). He also draws on his own experiences with 24-7 Prayer, where the focus is on raw, unscripted communication with God.
Try this: Start by simply talking to God as you would a trusted friend. Don't worry about perfect words or long durations. Begin with short, honest expressions of your thoughts and feelings. Try journaling your prayers to remove the pressure of speaking aloud.
Related ideas: authenticity, simplicity, relational-prayer
The P.R.A.Y.E.R. Framework
A practical and adaptable structure to deepen your prayer life.
Greig introduces a helpful acronym, P.R.A.Y.E.R. (P-Pause, R-Rejoice, A-Ask, Y-Yield, E-Engage, R-Resist), which offers a flexible way to explore different parts of prayer. This is not about following a strict order but about finding various ways to interact with God. 'Pause' means listening, 'Rejoice' focuses on thanks, 'Ask' covers praying for others, 'Yield' means surrender, 'Engage' encourages a broader view, and 'Resist' deals with spiritual challenges. This structured approach helps move beyond simple requests to a more complete and active engagement with God.
“The P.R.A.Y.E.R. acronym isn't a rigid formula, but a helpful scaffold to build a more robust and varied prayer life.”
In the book: The entire book is structured around explaining each letter of the P.R.A.Y.E.R. framework, offering biblical examples and personal anecdotes for each component. For instance, 'Pauses' is illustrated by stories of contemplative prayer and 'Ask' by the persistent widow parable.
Try this: Dedicate a specific time each day or week to intentionally move through one or more elements of the P.R.A.Y.E.R. framework. For example, spend 5 minutes in 'Pauses' listening, then 5 minutes in 'Rejoice' expressing gratitude, and so on. Experiment to find what resonates most with you.
Related ideas: prayer-framework, structured-prayer, holistic-prayer
Embrace the Silence: The Power of Pauses
Cultivate listening in prayer, recognizing God's voice in stillness.
In a noisy, busy world, the idea of 'Pauses' in prayer is important. Greig argues that many people pray as a monologue, missing the key part of listening. He supports contemplative prayer, urging readers to make time for silence and stillness, allowing God to speak. This is not about emptiness, but about becoming open. Learning to hear God's voice takes practice and patience, and it often comes not in loud announcements, but in quiet suggestions, feelings, or insights that appear in silent moments. This practice builds intimacy and provides guidance.
“The greatest poverty of our age is not material, but the poverty of silence. Without silence, we cannot hear.”
In the book: Greig draws on the tradition of desert fathers and mothers, as well as the story of Elijah hearing God not in the wind, earthquake, or fire, but in a 'gentle whisper' (1 Kings 19:11-13). He shares personal stories of receiving clarity and direction during periods of quiet reflection.
Try this: Start with short periods of silence (1-5 minutes) before or after your spoken prayers. Focus on your breath, and consciously invite God to speak. Don't judge the silence; simply be present. Gradually increase the duration as you become more comfortable.
Related ideas: contemplative-prayer, listening-prayer, silence, discernment
Wrestling with Unanswered Prayer
Navigating disappointment and doubt when God seems silent or unresponsive.
Perhaps the hardest part of prayer is when our earnest requests seem to go unanswered. Greig addresses this tough topic directly, acknowledging the pain, confusion, and doubt it can cause. He does not offer simple answers but encourages readers to wrestle with God, like Jacob did. He looks at various reasons for unanswered prayer—timing, God's plan, our own growth, or a 'greater good' we cannot yet see. Most importantly, he states that unanswered prayer does not mean God is absent or uncaring. Instead, it often helps us grow, strengthening our faith and teaching us to trust God's wisdom beyond what we immediately understand.
“Unanswered prayer is not necessarily evidence of an absent God, but often an invitation to deeper trust and a broader perspective.”
In the book: Greig shares powerful stories of individuals like Corrie Ten Boom, who experienced profound suffering and yet maintained faith despite unanswered prayers for specific outcomes. He also references the biblical story of Jesus praying in Gethsemane, where his specific request for the cup to be removed was not granted, yet he submitted to God's will.
Try this: When facing unanswered prayer, instead of giving up, journal your honest feelings of disappointment and anger towards God. Then, consciously choose to re-engage, perhaps by praying for understanding, patience, or a renewed sense of God's presence, even without the desired outcome.
Related ideas: unanswered-prayer, doubt, suffering, trust, perseverance
Intercession: Beyond Self-Interest
Expanding your prayer beyond personal needs to impact the world.
Greig sees praying for others as a powerful act of love and partnership with God. Beyond just asking for personal blessings, praying for others means standing up for friends, family, communities, nations, and global issues. He argues that God, in his wisdom, often chooses to work through the prayers of his people. This is not about changing God's mind, but aligning our hearts with His and allowing His power into situations. Praying for others changes the person praying, building empathy and a global view, while also showing a real belief in God's ability to act in human affairs.
“True intercession is not just about bringing requests to God; it's about partnering with God in his redemptive work in the world.”
In the book: He cites numerous biblical examples of intercession, such as Abraham pleading for Sodom and Gomorrah, Moses interceding for Israel, and Jesus praying for his disciples. Greig also shares inspiring stories from the 24-7 Prayer movement about how concerted intercession has led to tangible societal and spiritual breakthroughs.
Try this: Dedicate a specific day of the week to pray for a particular group (e.g., Mondays for your family, Tuesdays for your city, Wednesdays for global issues). Use news headlines or specific needs shared by others as prompts for your intercessory prayers.
Related ideas: intercessory-prayer, global-prayer, compassion, spiritual-warfare
Praying 'Yes' to God's Will
Embracing surrender and alignment with divine purpose.
The 'Yield' in Greig's P.R.A.Y.E.R. framework refers to the often-overlooked idea of surrender. It means aligning our desires with God's will, even when it is difficult or requires personal sacrifice. This is not passive acceptance, but an active, faith-filled commitment to God's larger plan. Greig stresses that true freedom and fulfillment come not from getting our own way, but from living in harmony with our Creator's design. This type of prayer builds humility, trust, and a willingness to step into uncomfortable situations, knowing that God's path ultimately leads to life. It is a prayer that changes the heart of the person praying, making them open to divine direction.
“The deepest form of prayer is not to tell God what you want, but to tell God you want what He wants.”
In the book: The ultimate example is Jesus' prayer in Gethsemane, 'Nevertheless, not my will, but yours be done' (Luke 22:42). Greig also shares stories of individuals who made radical life changes or faced difficult circumstances by consciously saying 'yes' to what they believed was God's calling.
Try this: Regularly ask God, 'What is your will in this situation?' or 'What do you want me to do?' Practice saying 'Yes' to small promptings, even if they feel inconvenient, to build your capacity for greater surrender. Journal about areas where you find it difficult to say 'yes' and explore the underlying reasons.
Related ideas: surrender, gods-will, obedience, humility, alignment
Prayer as Spiritual Warfare
Engaging in prayer to resist evil and advance God's kingdom.
Greig directly addresses the often-uncomfortable topic of spiritual challenges, seeing prayer as a main tool. He clarifies that this is not about dramatic exorcisms for every problem, but about recognizing that spiritual forces exist in the world that try to hinder God's purposes and oppress humanity. Prayer, in this context, becomes an active resistance against these forces, breaking their influence and releasing God's light and truth. It encourages a sense of urgency and responsibility, allowing believers to actively participate in the spiritual battle through their requests and declarations, rather than passively watching evil.
“Prayer is not just a conversation; it's a confrontation. We are engaging in spiritual warfare, pushing back against the darkness.”
In the book: He references Ephesians 6:12 about wrestling against spiritual forces and stories of Jesus confronting demons. Greig also shares anecdotes from 24-7 Prayer's work in challenging spiritual strongholds in cities and nations, seeing tangible shifts in atmospheres and circumstances.
Try this: When you encounter injustice, oppression, or persistent negative patterns, pray specifically for God's light to penetrate the darkness. Use biblical declarations and commands against spiritual forces, rather than just vague requests. Pray for protection over yourself and others.
Related ideas: spiritual-warfare, deliverance, resistance, kingdom-advancement
The Long Game of Prayer
Cultivating perseverance and patience for lasting spiritual transformation.
Greig stresses that prayer is often a long-term commitment, not a quick fix. He challenges the modern desire for instant results, reminding readers that spiritual growth and significant breakthroughs often require consistent, persistent prayer over time. This 'long game' view encourages perseverance through dry spells, doubt, and seemingly unanswered prayers. It builds resilience and deepens faith, as one learns to trust God's timing and process. The combined effect of consistent prayer, even small prayers, leads to deep personal change and greater impact over time, much like the slow but powerful erosion of a river.
“Prayer is less like a microwave and more like a slow cooker. It often works subtly, patiently, and over the long haul.”
In the book: Greig often refers to the parable of the persistent widow (Luke 18:1-8) and the stories of biblical figures like Daniel, whose prayers were answered after significant delays. He also shares the multi-year journey of the 24-7 Prayer movement, highlighting how sustained prayer led to global impact.
Try this: Commit to a consistent, even if short, daily prayer time for a specific period (e.g., 30 days). Keep a prayer journal to track your requests and any perceived answers or shifts over time, helping you recognize the 'slow cooker' effect of prayer.
Related ideas: perseverance, patience, consistency, spiritual-growth, long-term-faith
How to Pray Quotes
“Prayer is not a way to get what we want, but a way to get what God wants.”
“The greatest enemy of prayer is not business, but busyness.”
“God always answers prayer, but sometimes the answer is 'no,' and sometimes it's 'wait.'”
“Prayer is not just talking to God; it's also listening to Him.”
“The best way to learn to pray is to pray.”
“Don't just pray for big things; pray for small things too. God cares about the details of your life.”
“Prayer is the engine room of mission.”
“Sometimes the greatest act of faith is to keep showing up, even when you don't feel like it.”
“Our prayers don't change God's mind; they align our hearts with His.”
“Prayer is less about getting answers and more about encountering God.”
“When we pray, we are inviting God to do what only He can do.”
“Prayer is not a monologue; it's a conversation. And like any good conversation, it requires both speaking and silence.”
“The kingdom of God advances on its knees.”
“True prayer is not an escape from reality, but a way to engage with it supernaturally.”
Quiz
10 questions on the main ideas. Each answer comes with a short explanation.
Question 1
According to Pete Greig in 'How to Pray', what is one of the foundational principles for starting a prayer life?
- Memorizing complex theological prayers.
- Attending daily corporate prayer meetings.
- Keeping prayer simple and honest.
- Engaging in fasting before every prayer.
Show answer
C. Keeping prayer simple and honest. Pete Greig emphasizes that prayer doesn't have to be complicated. He advocates for simple, honest, and relevant conversations with God to make prayer accessible to everyone, from skeptics to committed followers.
Question 2
Which of the following historical figures is NOT explicitly mentioned in the description as inspiring through the power of prayer in 'How to Pray'?
- Corrie Ten Boom
- Joni Eareckson Tada
- Mother Teresa
- Saint Patrick
Show answer
C. Mother Teresa The book description specifically lists Corrie Ten Boom, Joni Eareckson Tada, and Saint Patrick as individuals whose stories inspire through the power of prayer. Mother Teresa is not mentioned.
Question 3
What is 'The Prayer Course' described as in relation to 'How to Pray'?
- A separate, unrelated prayer seminar.
- A paid subscription service for advanced prayer techniques.
- A free video curriculum designed to be used with the book.
- An audiobook version of 'How to Pray'.
Show answer
C. A free video curriculum designed to be used with the book. The description states that 'How to Pray' is designed to be used with 'The Prayer Course', which is a free video curriculum, making it useful for personal, small group, or church-wide reading.
Question 4
Pete Greig is described as one of the founders of which international prayer movement?
- Alpha USA
- Circle Maker Movement
- 24-7 Prayer International
- New Life Church
Show answer
C. 24-7 Prayer International The book description identifies Pete Greig as one of the founders of 24-7 Prayer International, highlighting his expertise and passion for prayer.
Question 5
Which specific challenge in prayer is addressed by a dedicated section in 'How to Pray'?
- How to interpret prophetic dreams.
- Coping with unanswered prayer.
- Organizing large-scale prayer events.
- Developing a theological framework for prayer.
Show answer
B. Coping with unanswered prayer. The list of topics covered in the book includes 'Cope with unanswered prayer,' indicating that Greig provides practical guidance for this common struggle.
Question 6
How does 'How to Pray' aim to help readers engage with God beyond spoken words?
- By encouraging silent meditation only during church services.
- Through a section on contemplative prayer without words.
- By advocating for a complete cessation of verbal prayer.
- By focusing solely on written prayers and journals.
Show answer
B. Through a section on contemplative prayer without words. One of the key areas the book teaches is 'Pray without words through contemplative prayer,' suggesting methods for non-verbal connection with God.
Question 7
Mark Batterson, author of 'Circle Maker', describes Pete Greig's approach to prayer as:
- Highly academic and theoretical.
- Simple, honest, straightforward, from the heart.
- Primarily focused on historical prayer traditions.
- Exclusively for seasoned believers.
Show answer
B. Simple, honest, straightforward, from the heart. Mark Batterson's endorsement states, 'Pete Greig is a respected authority on exactly this kind of praying: simple, honest, straightforward, from the heart.'
Question 8
What is the primary audience 'How to Pray' targets, as indicated by the description?
- Only seminary students and theologians.
- Exclusively those struggling with advanced spiritual disciplines.
- Everyone, from committed followers of Jesus to skeptics and the scared.
- Leaders of large church organizations.
Show answer
C. Everyone, from committed followers of Jesus to skeptics and the scared. The description explicitly states, 'How to Pray is a raw, real, and remarkable how-to-guide on prayer for everyone―from the committed follower of Jesus to the skeptic and the scared,' indicating a very broad target audience.
Question 9
What is the implied core problem 'How to Pray' seeks to solve for its readers regarding their prayer life?
- Lack of knowledge about ancient prayer rituals.
- The perception that prayer is the most challenging area of their Christian journey.
- An overabundance of prayer time without structure.
- The inability to pray in public settings.
Show answer
B. The perception that prayer is the most challenging area of their Christian journey. The very first line of the description poses the question, 'Is prayer the most challenging area of your Christian journey?' and then immediately states, 'It doesn’t have to be,' positioning the book as a solution to this core problem.
Question 10
According to Craig Springer, what makes 'How to Pray' a 'prayer masterpiece for today'?
- Its extensive academic bibliography.
- Its focus on complex theological debates.
- It is an easy-to-follow, easy-to-practice manifesto of prayer for everyday life.
- Its reliance on exclusive, esoteric prayer methods.
Show answer
C. It is an easy-to-follow, easy-to-practice manifesto of prayer for everyday life. Craig Springer's endorsement describes the book as 'an easy-to-follow, easy-to-practice manifesto of prayer for everyday life,' highlighting its accessibility and practical application.
How to Pray FAQ
What is the core message of 'How to Pray' by Pete Greig?
The book aims to demystify prayer, presenting it as a simple, honest, and relevant conversation with God accessible to everyone, regardless of their spiritual background. It provides practical guidance and encouragement to help individuals develop a life-giving prayer practice.
Does 'How to Pray' offer solutions for unanswered prayer?
Yes, the book addresses the challenging topic of unanswered prayer, offering biblical wisdom and real-life methods to help readers cope with this experience and maintain their faith. It provides guidance on navigating the complexities of divine timing and purpose.
What is contemplative prayer, and how does the book explain it?
Contemplative prayer is a form of prayer that focuses on being present with God without words, often involving silence and deep listening. 'How to Pray' introduces readers to this practice, guiding them on how to engage in prayer beyond verbal requests.
How is 'How to Pray' different from other prayer books like Mark Batterson's 'Circle Maker'?
While both encourage prayer, 'How to Pray' emphasizes a foundational, accessible approach to prayer for all levels, including skeptics, focusing on simple conversation and various prayer forms. 'Circle Maker' often focuses more on persistent, audacious prayer and drawing spiritual circles around one's dreams and prayers.
Who is 'How to Pray' intended for?
The book is designed for a wide audience, from committed followers of Jesus seeking to refresh their prayer life to skeptics and those new to faith. It aims to make prayer approachable and understandable for anyone interested in connecting with God.
Does 'How to Pray' include stories of famous people and their prayer experiences?
Yes, the book inspires readers with powerful stories of prayer from historical and contemporary figures such as Corrie Ten Boom, Joni Eareckson Tada, and Saint Patrick, illustrating the real-life impact and power of prayer.
How can 'How to Pray' be used in groups or churches?
The book is designed to complement The Prayer Course, a free video curriculum, making it an excellent resource for personal study, small group discussions, or church-wide reading programs. It facilitates shared learning and growth in prayer.
What methods does Pete Greig suggest for hearing God?
Pete Greig provides practical guidance on how to discern and hear God's voice, integrating this aspect into a holistic prayer life. The book offers insights and methods to help individuals cultivate a listening posture in their conversations with God.
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